Your Pro Football Picks With Dippy...And Fox, Too

As Dippy and I almost choked on our tongues watching Ohio State completely look ahead to next week and their match-up with USC and was actually trailing going into the fourth quarter to Ohio, we took the time to come up with our pro picks for Sunday.

Kansas City at New England (-15)
Fox: The first week of the NFL season is a hard one to pick because you aren't sure what you are going to get from certain teams. A prime example is New England. Is Tom Brady's foot amputated? Is he now stuck with a STD? Has he blown all his cash on HGH? Who knows? The Pats may have the Super Bowl Loser Blues (every other team has had this in the last five years), but they are the least likely to experience it. Coach Hoodie will not allow it to happen. He'll kill off some referees if necessary. New England will make a statement against a horrible KC team. Take the Pats.
Dippy: The line is way too high. Take KC. Fox, I really think you need to get over your hatred for Tom Brady. Didn't you actually buy a Patriots hat this summer?
Fox: What? You must be off the wagon.

Arizona (-1) at San Francisco
Fox: Has this O'Sullivan guy actually started a real NFL game before? I am not sure. I don't trust a first time starter in the first game of the year ever. Arizona is not a good team, but the 49ers are worse. It does not matter if the game is in San Francisco. Take Arizona.
Dippy: I would really be off the wagon if I picked San Fran in this game. There will be an office pool somewhere where people in the Bay Area will get to pick which Bay Area team will win more games: Cal, Stanford, Raiders, or 49ers. My money is on Cal. Arizona should win in San Francisco.

Dallas (-5.5) at Cleveland
Fox: This looks like a sucker bet. Cleveland's stock has been falling all pre-season. Dallas is absolutely loaded. It looks like a mis-match. Dallas is only favored by 5 1/2 at Cleveland. This is harder than it should be. Derek Anderson faded in the last two months of the season last year. He is over rated. The Browns defense is as terrible as they look. Take Dallas. Is there a pool on how long it will take for Pac-Man to get arrested again now that he is reinstated. This should be somewhere. I'd go for eight weeks.
Dippy: I'd go for twelve. I don't know about this one either. I think that Cleveland will do better than you think. The pre-season is nothing when it comes to a predictor of the regular season. Just look at the Redskins...er...ok. Well, I am still taking the Browns.

Carolina at San Diego (-9.5)
Dippy: Fox, you used to live in Charlotte. You were there in the dark days of Rae Carruth. That must have been fun when they were going 1-15 and Carruth was on trial. The Panthers rebounded in 2002 and have not been the same since. The window has closed on Carolina and John Fox. Steve Smith is suspended for pounding one of his teammates into the ground..again. Jake is coming off Tommy John surgery. The Panthers are a shell of themselves. San Diego will run a circle around a listless Panther team.
Fox: Yes, I lived in Charlotte and I wish I was still there. I was there for the whole Rae Carruth thing. That is when Charlotte joined the big time when a city's sports athletes become police blotter material. Sex, drugs, and money were the factors in that case. Carruth is still in prison. Ron Mexico is getting out way before he ever will. I initially thought that this line was too high. However, San Diego is at home. Jake is coming off Tommy John. No Steve Smith and an aging defense that is hanging on like a gerbil in a dishwasher. Take San Diego

Detroit (-3) at Atlanta
Fox: The Falcons will not be favored to win any game this year. They will likely be 1-15 or 2-14. This will be one of the worst seasons in Atlanta history which is saying an awful lot. I survived the Gerald Riggs era. This is a new era. Of what I am not sure. I'll let everyone know in a few years. This is Matt Ryan's first game and I never pick a rookie quarterback in playing in his first game. John Elway was torn apart in his first game in Pittsburgh and Ryan is not Elway. This will be a bloodbath of a season and it is too bad that the Falcons get Detroit in the first game because later in the year they would have more of a chance. Tomorrow the Falcons don't have a chance to win. Take Detroit.
Dippy: I don't think that the Falcons will be as bad as you think, Fox. Coach Smith is creating a defense with a nasty attitude. They are going to play aggressive on defense and they will try to physically punish opponents. This is the only way they can win because they aren't going to score many points. However, I would not be surprised if the Falcons defense makes a name for themselves this season. They may not win, but teams will have to fight for their lives in many games to be able to avoid an embarrassing loss. I am taking Detroit because the point spread is just low enough to be worth the risk.