We Have Too Much Time On Our Hands #1

Every week or so I will be providing some videos to the masses just to fill in time and prove that I and whoever put these videos together have absolutely way too much time on their hands. Or they aren't getting laid. Or both.

Proof in point is this video that appears to be sort of quite clever. Then again, whoever spent the time to put this together either has some sort of sexual fetish for Star Wars or is totally bored. Or drinking way too much Pepsi.




Then there is this video that is set to some bad techno music and shows us the demolition derby that is Moscow traffic. In this case from a major tunnel in the city. Again, this person who uploaded this video was probably drinking way too much vodka and playing old Tatu CDs.




Then there is this gem. I can not decide whether or not this is actually funny or really just very stupid. This proves that as a country we have completely jumped the shark. The folks who put this thing together spent the last five days snorting meth off a hunting knife while driving an old Yugo to Mexico. If you check their record you'll find numerous arrests for public intoxication and crimes against nature.




I could not have a video segment without taking another shot against Sarah Palin. I have tried to listen to one of her speeches and I can't get through any one of them without wanting to shoot myself in the knee cap and poor vodka on the wound. Her statements are full of either absurd falsehoods, patronizing drivel, inane stupidity, and over used cliches. She is the biggest and most flagrant example of everything that is wrong with politics right now. Fake, condescending, and shrill. My twelve year old daughter can see through Palin's veneer of competency and legitimacy. She exclaimed in the car driving to get Chinese food that Palin was a "gimmick." Fact of the matter is that with every word she speaks she proves how much of a gimmicky figure head she is who was only put on the ticket to manipulate and con people into thinking that McCain was progressive. Anyone who believes that this Palin character is legitimate should move to North Korea. So for giggles I added this last video. Enjoy!!

Ladies And Gentlemen Of The Jury: The Case Against Sarah Palin

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'd like to begin my opening statements in this case.  This case is all about the issues.  It is all about promises.  Promises made to a party.  To a nation. Promises that either have already been broken and promises that have no chance of coming true.  Why? Because the defendant in this case, GOP Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin has no intentions to keep them.  She has no intention to keep these promises because it is not in her nature to do so.  In fact, it is impossible in this case for her to do so.  She is being forced to attempt to adopt and parrot the GOP line.  She has put herself out to the public as a regular Jane.  A regular mom.  A hockey mom, in fact.  She and her running mate, John McCain, have advertised themselves as "mavericks" ready to go out into the world and change the system.  To change Washington, DC politics.  They state they are against special interests when in fact the people that are running their campaign are big business lobbyists of the highest caliber.  The defendant claims that she is a fiscal conservative.  However, the population of the state of Alaska where she is the governor has the highest state income tax burden per capita of any state in the country.   The state of Alaska spends more per person than any other state in the country.  This does not sound like fiscal conservatism.   She says she is against pork barrel projects, yet she has lobbied Washington, the very place she wants to "reform", for multiple pork projects that have literally in some cases gone "nowhere."  Her record for fiscal reform and limiting government spending is sketchy to say the least.  Her state is virtually controlled by the oil industry.  Citizens of Alaska get kick backs from the oil companies as hush money so that they will not complain that some of their tactics might be harmful to the environment.  All thanks to the defendant who has either supported these policies or looked the other way.  The defendant's coming party at the GOP convention provided us with a sample of her stated platform.  The below CNN segment provides evidence of where her stated platform at the GOP convention differs or is similar to the facts of the case--her actions while in office:  




Ladies and gentlemen, this is not about the defendant's family.  It's not about her daughter's pregnancy.  Those are off limits, even for me.  This is about her contradictions.  It is about what she says and does that is a snow job.  It's fraudulent.  It is simply a smokescreen thrown on the public.   So much so that it is insulting to anyone with a critical brain that looks beyond the smokescreen.

The defendant has continued to try to pound home the idea of change.  That she and her running mate will bring "real" change.  I present to you that I will prove that there is no such change coming under their administration.  In fact, it will more of the same.  The same ideas, rules, special interests, back pocket deals, and lobbying for the elite that got this country into a war it should have never started and a financial crisis that it should have seen coming.  Note the clip of Gov. Palin's interview below:

Listening to the defendant speak, it isn't the language of change.  It is the language of more of the same.  The language of a third Bush term just with different people behind the desk.  The defendant, if she were put in the vice presidential slot, one heartbeat away from the Oval Office, would give us the same litany of broken down policies and empty promises that we have seen in the last eight years.  Ladies and gentlemen, I will provide beyond a reasonable doubt that Sarah Palin is a fraud to her own political party and logically a fraud to the people.  She is the image of style over substance.  There is "style" if one could call it that, but when the evidence, the substance is presented it contradicts itself and the image of the defendant to such a degree that you will have no other reasonable choice but to find the defendant--guilty as charged.

Running From Sarah Palin And Your Pro Football Picks

Dippy and I are hiding out from the goons that Sarah Palin have sent to kill us both for last night's post. I can't tell you where we are for fear that they will find us. They have sent black helicopters and Terminator robots from the future to come and get us. This is worse than that Easter Bunny that came after me last Easter. I have never seen an Easter Bunny with an semi-automatic handgun. I am not clear why they would want Dippy except for the fact that he made sexual references towards the governor of Alaska, which is both disturbed and apparently illegal. Dippy has let me know that the government is bailing out large banks with bad debt. So not only I have to pay off my bad debt I now have to pay off some bank's debt so that their CEO can continue to keep his yacht and stable of hookers? This is Capitalism Gone Wild. These banks may have survived the Great Depression, but there is no surviving being utterly stupid. If you are stupid enough to give out a loan or mortgage to someone who by all accounts can not afford it, then you are stupid and do not deserve being bailed out by taxpayers. Everyone out there has their own "Bill" out there. "Bill" is that friend or family member who is always asking for money, but everyone knows based on his track record that he is not going to pay it back. Everyone around "Bill" who knows him knows that by giving him money that is simply giving money away. Then "Bill" meets "Tom" who ignores all of this and thinks they're going to be smart and make a profit off of "Bill" by charging weird interest rates that change as time goes on and he goes ahead and gives him money. Years later, "Bill" has not given much of the money back and never will...mainly because he never has. Not necessarily because "Bill" is a freeloader. It's just with all his good intentions he just can't do it. These banks and loaners that give away these loans and mortgages and now are sucking the rest of us dry by being bailed out by us, they are the "Tom"s. So the US government, horribly in debt, is now taking on the horrible debt of large banks. How does this not end in total disaster?

Oh, well. Dippy and I need to make our professional football picks.

Miami at New England (er, the Evil Empire, -12.5)

Fox: Everyone needs to remember that the Evil Empire has the easiest schedule in the league. Everyone must remember that Joey Porter can not keep his mouth shut. As a result, the Evil Empire has bulletin board material and a college team to play against this week. I wonder who would win between Miami and USC on a neutral field. As Tom Brady is trying to impregnate Brooke Hogan, the Patriots will roll all over the Dolphins. Take the Pats, er, Evil Empire.

Dippy: Miami is better than you think. And Miami has lots of good cocaine available. The Pats might win, but they won't cover. Take Miami.

Dallas at Green Bay (+3)

Dippy: Interesting game. Rodgers is playing well so far, but he is not playing the Lions this week. You have to look at the fact that the two teams the Packers have beaten are a combined 0-4. Dallas is so much better talent wise than Green Bay. It is not time enough yet for them to self-destruct. It's not frigid in Green Bay right now. Take Dallas as T.O. and Pac-Man score touchdowns this weekend.

Fox: Anyone else notice that Cowboys are now the new Raiders? The Cowboys have made it habit for well over a decade of bringing in malcontents and locker room cancers in order to reform them enough to win. The Cowboys now are that team. Even Tony Romo is like Ken Stabler. It's crazy. I really want to take the Packers in this game, however, I just can't. The Packers are one of the weakest 2-0 teams and it will show this weekend. Dallas it is.

Arizona at Washington (-3)

Dippy: You ever hear from Kidnapper 47?

Fox: No, I have not heard from him or her for awhile. Since you were released.

Dippy: I really connected with that guy.

Fox: Dippy, he or she doped you up like crazy and kept you captive for over a month threatening to kill you if I didn't drop Atlanta sports teams in favor of Washington's. He or she also killed your resistance puppy, er uh, drug dog. You probably have Stockholm Syndrome.

Dippy: I don't buy all that. I just wondering if Kidnapper 47 was around so I could talk to him. That's all.

Fox: Whatever then. Any sighting of those Terminator robots?

Dippy: No.

Fox: I told you not to make those sexual comments about Palin. I knew we'd end up on the run.

Dippy: It was you that called her a fraud. They are after you....you, I said. Ehhhh....ehhh....ehhh..

Fox: I knew you would crack under the pressure. Well, anyways I am taking the Cardinals in this game as they will outscore the Washington offense. The Cardinals will not have the same secondary as the Saints. Campbell is not going to roll up 300 plus yards again. The Redskins are vulnerable to the pass. The Cardinals have a good quarterback and two great receivers. Take the Cardinals.

Dippy: In honor of Kidnapper 47, I am going to take the Redskins. Matter of fact, I am taking the Redskins in every single game for the rest of the season no matter what happens. Take the Redskins. Redskins 287 Cardinals 2.

Fox: Geez.

New York Jets at San Diego (-9.5)

Dippy: The Jets are a factor with Favre, but they are so over-rated. The Chargers psyche is destroyed. Just gone. Blown game last week because the referee was on the take with the line being San Diego by one point. That ref couldn't let the Chargers cover. So the quick whistle trick. Boom, Denver wins. Boom, outta here. Take the Chargers who may be psyched out, but they are also pissed off and the Jets are not really that good.

Fox: Too many points for a team that is 0-2 and lost two straight heartbreaker games. The Jets will be in every game as long as Favre is still standing. I am not sure that the Jets can win, but the Chargers are not going to win by more than ten.

Kansas City at Atlanta (-5.5)

Dippy: Can you believe that Atlanta is favored in this game? I thought you said that they would not be favored in any game this year.

Fox: This is all because the Chiefs are worse than Sarah Palin on a water diet. They are awful. When you lose to the Raiders who are owned by a dead guy by as badly as they did, then you are the worst team close to ever. I am not sure how Coach Edwards keeps his job after this week. I think, on the other hand, the spread is too high. I think Atlanta will win, but only by a field goal at the end. Elam will kill the Chiefs again just like he did when he was with Denver, but take the Chiefs.

Dippy: Uh. I am so sick of picking Atlanta games. The Chiefs are truly bad. They don't have an offense or a defense. I did not really think that anyone would be as bad as Atlanta, but then the Chiefs came along. I think if the Hawks played the Chiefs they would win. Take Atlanta and excuse me while I run from the approaching Terminator robot that looks just like Sarah Palin. RUN!!!!

Your College Picks With Dippy And Fox

As Sarah Palin continues her beauty contest tour of complete hypocrisy and drivel, Dippy and I are pondering the financial markets.  We are thinking of cashing our 401K's in and investing in any company based out of Cuba.  We think that will be a more sound investment that putting our money into AIG and any long standing brokerage firm.  Equally as sound is making college football picks because it is clearly obvious that neither one of us know what we are talking about.  However, neither is any candidate running in the Presidential election.  At least we're trying.

Mississippi State at Georgia Tech  (-8)

Fox:  Let's just admit that we don't know anything about these two teams.  Why are we even picking this game.  It's like picking whether or not a dog will cross the road or not.  

Dippy:  Or a alcoholic chicken.

Fox:  You know all about that.  More than me.  I have a natural dislike for Georgia Tech that has dated back thirty years now.  I never think they are any good.  They barely lost at Virginia Tech last weekend and I am not sure what that even tells us.  This line simply is too high.  Mississippi State is better than an eight point underdog even if it's on the road.   I am taking Mississippi State.

Dippy:  Don't you know anything?  I mean you think Sarah Palin is a fraud.  You think that John McCain has had too many botox injections.   You think that the markets are unsound.   You keep crying wolf about Skylab like it's going to fall out of the sky or something.

Fox:  It did.  About thirty years ago.

Dippy: Well, you know what I am talking about.  You are a silly crazy person with a chip on his shoulder.  Get over yourself.  Take Georgia Tech.

Virginia Tech at North Carolina (-3)

Dippy:  Ehh...

Fox:  OK, I'll start this one.  You're busy with your pet razor.  North Carolina looked impressive against Rutgers.  They were throwing the ball all over the place.  They ran all over them.  However, it was Rutgers and they are on a downhill spiral.  Virginia Tech rebounded against Georgia Tech, but they are in a rebuilding mode.  They are playing a great deal of young guys who have talent, but lack overall experience.  Tech will be better as the year goes, but they are out of sorts right now.  I do not think that the Tar Heels will have two big games in a row on the road.  They are not as good as Virginia Tech and they will lose by more than a field goal.

Dippy:  Did you see Tina Fey play Sarah Palin on "Saturday Night Live" last weekend.  It was, as you say, classic.  She got it right on.  It made me want to nail Sarah Palin.  

Fox:  You are sicker than I thought.

Dippy:  Palin is hot, man.  Those glasses she wears.  I mean...I'd like to rip them off her face and...

Fox:  No, no, no...we're not going there buddy.  Send it to Penthouse.  Not here.  What about the Tar Heels and Hokies game?  You have got to pick something.  Anyways, Sarah Palin is a complete phony.  She says that she is like the rest of us.  She says that she is a conservative.  She is neither.   Her state is the highest tax state in the country per capita.  Her state is the highest spender per capita than any state in the country.  She lobbied the feds to get tons of money earmarked to her state on pet projects that we complete pork barrel projects.  How does that make her a fiscal conservative?   Sarah Palin is a beauty queen, a politician, and a rich woman and don't think she doesn't have money to burn probably mainly kick backs from oil companies that have been allowed to destroy her state, don't let her "small town" presentation fool you.  That does not make her like us.  Not everyone is a beauty queen.  Not everyone can be a cut throat politico.  Definitely, not everyone is rich.  She says all this crap about being a hockey mom.  That's great.  Does she now, as governor of Alaska, still drive around being a "hockey mom"?  Probably not.  She may have done that years and years ago, but she is not that now.  Simply put, she is not truthful.  She tries to come off as being "real" and "genuine" but she is none of those things.   Her state gives everyone $2,000 a year as a result of the oil industry?  That's not fiscally responsible or conservative.  

Dippy:  Whow...pal.  Isn't this a football pick blog entry?  Speaking of football picks I think that North Carolina is under-rated.  They have had a lot of down years in Chapel Hill, but it all changes this weekend as they put football back on the map at UNC by knocking off Tech in Blacksburg.   

Florida at Tennessee  (+7.5)

Fox:  I am not done with Sarah Palin.  I know, Dippy, that you think she is hot, which makes you extremely disturbed.  It makes sense that you would be attracted to her.  You are so into the swinger thing at that hotel you work for.  I am not done.  I am just piling up evidence on how much a fraud she is.  I'll write an entry about it.  Just wait.  Once I get all of my evidence together I'm ending this story by running her into the wall.

Dippy:  Isn't that last line from a Geico chimerical?  Anyways, Florida is the team in the SEC East that nobody is talking much about.  Everybody is focused on the Georgia Bulldogs and their run towards a possible national title shot.  Meanwhile, Florida has simply reloaded and still has their top quarterback, running back, and wide receiver on offense.  They have a huge chip on their shoulder for having a down year last year.  They are #4 right behind Georgia and they have played better than Georgia all year.  They will wipe the floor with Tennessee even though the game is in Knoxville.

Fox:  I have to say that you are right about Florida.  They have been impressive all year.  They have had those style points that Georgia has lacked.  This is their first SEC test, in Knoxsvillle, but I am sure that Urban Meyer is telling his team that they aren't getting enough respect.  That no one thinks they are as good as Georgia and on and on.  They want so badly to do better than last year.  This game in Tennessee will be a showcase for them to show everyone that they are a very very good team.  Take Florida.

LSU at Auburn (+2.5)

Fox:  You know.  I can't let go of this Sarah Palin thing.  I just can not believe that people are being so snowed by her.  Doesn't anyone see out there that she is a fake.  That she is not what she is making herself out to be?  She is a former beauty queen.  They are trained to act like someone they are not.  Add the fact that she is a politician and it's a hundred times worse.  I guess I have to save the rest for another post, but just listening to her pisses me off.  This is going to be an interesting game.  This will be a huge test for both teams.  I am worried that Auburn doesn't have an offense.  They won their last game 3-2 in a game they should have won by two touchdowns.  They have a stellar defense that will keep matters close.  However, LSU is really that good.  They are the better team overall.  They will win by at least three points even though they will be at Auburn.  I just don't think they're going to score enough against the Tigers defense.

Dippy:  I am sorry that you are so against Sarah Palin.  I think she's hot with those glasses.  Her voice makes her hotter.  Really.  It does.  

Fox:  Well, wear a rubber next time.

Dippy:  I'll try.  So in this game I believe in the opposite.  I am not sold on LSU.  I think that they are over-rated.  I don't believe that their offense has enough weapons on the field.  Their defense is not as strong as last year.  I think that Auburn will win this game, at home, in a close game.   I am taking Auburn.

Georgia at Arizona State (-7)

Fox:  Georgia slipped another slot in the polls even though they avenged last years loss to South Carolina by a touchdown in South Carolina.   This might be the last "easy" game they will have until they hit Georgia Tech at the end of the regular season.  Georgia is trying to get their wheels rolling.  They have a lot to prove on Saturday night in front of a large cable audience.  They are getting tired of the snubs.  They will get some style points against an over-rated ASU team.  Take Georgia by at least the same number of points as Sarah Palin's dress size.

Dippy:  Palin's dress size?  What are saying?  That her dress size is higher than seven?  That's pretty low.  Don't go down to the lowest denominator with jumping on her weight.  Stick to the issues.  

Fox:  That is the whole point.  No one is looking at Palin's issues.  They are not looking at what she really stands for.  Does she stand for her economic record in Alaska?  Or does she subscribe to McCain's message that is as clear as the fluid in Britney Spear's augmented breasts?  That is my whole point.  Look at what she stands for.  Look at what she has done not what she is saying she will do.  Best predictor of future behavior is past behavior.  Simple as that.  

Dippy:  Well, we have to finish this post before we get nailed by the Secret Service.  This is Georgia's moment.  They have an Arizona State team that is completely over-rated.  No one ranked legitimately in the Top 20 should lose to UNLV under any circumstances.  Ever.  Georgia will kill them.  Take the Dawgs.

Dippy

Last week:   4-5-1

Overall:        9-9-2

Fox

Last week:    7-2-1

Overall:        10-8-2